Turning pain into gain

All of us are hit by adversities, causing emotional and physical harm. And we wish and pray no one should be a victim of any adversity. But when it happens, then there is no way but to fight it out to survive its deadly hits and go on in life with positive attitude. It is to survive in such circumstances that we recall the saying that adversities are sometimes blessings in disguise.

Here is a cute story of a boy, as told by Dr Ramesh N Jani in ‘In Communion with Consciousness’, who braves all kinds of adversities.

The boy here is Maxim Gorky, the famous Russian author of the classic, The Mother. Young Maxim had a burning desire to study but his father won’t allow. His father was a tyrant who would beat him up as well as his mother over small issues. Maxim felt greater pain when he saw his mother being physically tortured.

Maxim was not the kind to keep crying and do nothing. He started working in a wastepaper-cum-old book shop. There he got the golden chance of reading the best of famous books. His curiosity for literature was so much that he was lost in the world of literary giants.

Soon he started penning down his thoughts. One day he showed what he had written to a friend who liked it so much that he saw in the young boy a g reat writer. And, accordingly, encouraged him to keep on writing and get it published. When it was finally published, you had what we call today with great critical acclaim, The Mother.

It is not that Maxim Gorky could not have become a great writer had he joined a formal classroom. Nobody can rule that out; but my point is that here was a boy who never lost sight of his way and took care of his interests even in the worst of circumstances. He became all the more emboldened to realise his ambition to be a writer like the ones he read with great interest and curiosity.

Maya will keep singing

As one learns someone one “knew” for years has bid adieu and has gone to the “other world”, it unsettles one. You may try to be philosophical and convince yourself that “what comes, must go”, but we are weaklings for early recovery to sanity.

We had last week this shock of learning that Maya Angelou has left us forever, after 86 years, during which time she made our world better and charming with her poetic vibes that saw no national boundaries around the globe.

If the “caged bird” wrote as many as 30 books of poetry and essays, her verses were weapons she used with great skill to fight against social injustices. She tried to get her country (US) and the world out of the bitter past of racial oppression and division. Her poetic calls were always to remind her people to dream and go ahead without looking back, so that they are in a position “To give birth/ again to a dream”.

Her moment of glory came when President-elect Bill Clinton honoured her by inviting her to compose and read a poem at his first inaugural day in 1993. ‘On the Pulse of the Morning’ that she read was a message of hope and the dawn of a new era, calling for the burial of the bitter past and looking forward to a bright tomorrow.

Also a social activist, she never forgot to see others did not have to face what she had to in her younger days. And that earned her the epithet, ‘Global Renaissance of Woman’. Giving glimpses of her own past, she wrote, “There is no greater agony than bearing an untold story inside you” (I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings). She wrote no matter what happens, or how bad it seems today, “life does go on, and it will be better tomorrow.”

She believed people may forget what you said, they may forget what you did, but they will never forget how you made them feel.

That was she, the caged bird, now free to sing out of worldly bondage.

Stillness speaks loudly

BEYOND SOUNDS IS A SACREDNESS THAT CANNOT BE UNDERSTOOD BY THOUGHTS ALONE

I recently went on a trip to Himachal Pradesh and was overwhelmed by the grace and beauty of the majestic mountains and the breathtaking scenery. I wondered what it was all about nature that makes us speechless. I got my answer while reading Eckhart Tolle’s The Power of Now and Stillness Speaks.

Eckhart says when we see something really beautiful or a breathtaking scenery, in that state of intense alertness, there is no mental commentary running simultaneously. It is this continuous mind activity that keeps us imprisoned in the world of form and becomes an opaque screen that prevents one from becoming conscious of the unmanifested.

However when we are intensely present, we don’t need to be concerned about the cessation of thinking , for the mind then stops automatically to behold that vision.

He says to bring our attention to a tree or flower doesn’t mean to think about it or label it, but simply to perceive it or hold it in your awareness.

Something of its essence then transmits itself to you. You can sense how still it is, and in doing so, the same stillness arises within you. You sense how deeply it rests in being and is completely at one with what it is and where it is. We don’t have to always go to the mountains or beaches to appreciate the beauty of nature.
When walking or resting in nature, we can honour that realm by being there fully. “Be still, look and listen. See how every animal and plant is completely itself.” However, he also cautions that for us to appreciate it, we need to go beyond the mental habit of labeling.

We bring awareness to the many subtle sounds of nature like the rustling of leaves in the wind , raindrops falling , the humming of an insect. We should give ourselves completely to the art of listening for beyond the sounds there is a sacredness that cannot be understood by thought.

So you need not always escape to the hills to enjoy nature; create it yourself around you.

The right way of life

AN IDEAL EXISTENCE IS ONE IN WHICH WE UNDERSTAND THE ALMIGHTY’S CALLING NO MATTER WHAT STATE OF MIND WE ARE GOING THROUGH

 We human beings are God’s finest creations, bestowed with all the qualities. But we are so self-engrossed in our materialistic endeavours that we forget the real purpose of our existence.

We live with the least gratitude towards the Almighty; wrongly considering ourselves responsible for all that is happening in our lives, remembering Him only in times of trouble.

A construction supervisor, standing on the 16th floor of a building, was trying to call a worker on the ground floor. Since there was a lot of noise, the worker did not hear his call and did not respond.

After repeated calls, the supervisor, in order to draw his attention, threw down a

10 note. The worker immediately picked up the note and put it in his pocket and continued working without seeing where it came from.

In order to draw the attention of the worker, the supervisor now threw a 500 note and the worker did the same.

This offended the supervisor so much that he picked up a small stone and threw it on the worker.

The stone hit the worker on the head and this time the worker looked up and the supervisor communicated with him.

This story holds a lot of similarity with our lives. God, who is in our hearts and everywhere else, wants to communicate with us in order to direct our lives in doing good deeds, but we totally ignore the calls.

He showers us with so many big and small gifts, which we happily grab without showing any gratitude, instead we proudly feel that it is purely our luck and nothing else.

Then, when one day we are hit with a stone, let’s call it a problem, we look up and try to communicate with Him. We pray and ask for His help.

It is rightly said, “He gives, gives and forgives; and we get, get and forget.”

So, one can say an ideal existence is one in which we always understand His calling, no matter what state of mind we are going through.

Search for the mystic within you

I used to get confused about mystics and their spiritual experiences. But it was over after I met a person with serenity, calmness and a godly look. He was able to unite himself with God and communicate his will to people. I asked him, “What makes you so tranquil?” He replied: “Silence, prayer and meditative union of my inner being with the Supreme Being.”

Since then I have been ‘in touch’ with the mystic within me. Take a deep dive within yourself and get in touch with your inner being . The voice calling you from your heart is your inner being. It’s in this mirror of true self that you see your genuine personality or image. It is here; your mystic is waiting to have an encounter with you. And finally, when faith takes a deep root in ones belief system, then through this language of faith, the revelation-event becomes a reality.

Some call this mystic the guardian angel or spirit who shows the way towards truth. It’s a spiritual or supernatural experience of God in oneself to realise godliness in one’s inner core. A mystic is someone who has passed beyond the veil of appearances into the eternal world of spirit. He is one who has undergone an enactment of his own death and has received knowledge of the divine life.

The word ‘mysticism’ comes from the Greeks. Originally, it was applied to those who had been initiated into some kind of esoteric knowledge of things divine. Today, mysticism has been defined as an attitude of mind, which seeks to transcend reason and experience directly the ‘ultimate reality’.

Ultimately, a human gets so fused in the Divine Being that s/ he turns out to be a true mystic while performing normal chores of daily life. The modernistic era of 21st century invites every one of us to get united with the mystic within us. Get going.

Give your worries to God

 A thief enters your house and you manage to catch him. What do you do with him? You are not allowed to punish him; you have to hand him over to the police. Another story: A tiger has begun to prowl around a village. What are the options for the villagers? Can they handle the situation by themselves?

Most probably, they will alert the wildlife authorities who could handle it as we can’t on our own.
Similarly, worrying is a very serious problem, which we are unable to handle and suffer greatly. Who can we give our worries to? The answer is: to God.

Many questions arise. Can we do this? Will God acce pt them? What will God do with them?
The answer to the first question is that we can do so even though it is not the same thing as tackling a problem, which we are supposed to do on our own. We can only seek God’s help in that, not entrust it to Him. Worrying is seriously dangerous when we don’t act but keep on getting obsessed by some problem, real or imagined.

The answer to the next question is: God will accept our worries if we are His devotees. God have promised such help in the Bhagavad-Geeta. Yes, we have to qualify for such a favour, which is not too difficult. God does not wish us to worry. He says so in the verse #18.54. He also states in the verse # 6.6 that using the mind for worrying is being an enemy of the self.

And the answer to the last question is simple: God is all-powerful; He can handle what no one can. If we cannot handle a problem, we have to give it to someone who can. Shouldn’t we do so if we wish to be freed from worries? But of course, you have to complete faith in the power of God and His willingness to save you from any kind of harm arising from a real or imaginary source. That is why we say: God bless you!

Repent and be happy

All of us throughout our lives, knowingly or unknowingly commit mistakes or do acts that may hurt someone or the other. A candid examination of our lives and deeds can be quite painful if we choose to wallow in our own mistakes.

To repent for our sins is to recognise and turn away from those actions and thoughts that no longer serve us; those barriers that we try to put up between God and ourselves. When we examine the word 'mistake', we discover a golden opportunity for a new life. We see that there has been a mistake and that we are allowed to retake the thought or the action for a more desirable outcome for all.

Repentance is the act of changing one's mind, to feel sorry for or reproachful for what one has done or has not done, or to feel such regret and dissatisfaction over some past action or intention as to change one's mind about it or to change one's way. It involves changing one's attachments - from earthly things to heavenly things.

It requires the right attitude towards sin. It is the right attitude towards God, self and others.

Repentance is not quitting a sin for a season; it is totally turning from an act of sin. One of the hardest things for men and women to do is to repent for their sins. It is a direct challenge to man's will power. It demands that he humbles himself before God and gives up everything that is contrary to His will.

Repentance also includes confession - acknowledgement of our sinfulness before God. The most important trait of a sincere seeker of truth is that he has the courage and humility to look straight into his feelings and frankly express his shortcomings. Humility gives the strength to fight and conquer them. All men sin and, as a result, all men need to turn from sin to righteousness. When man sins, he must either repent or perish. There is no other way. Happiness is all about realizing your mistakes and repenting.

Laugh Off your anger

    Julius Caeser was a haughty king. He had no control over his language and he normally used harsh words to scold his subjects. His uncivilized behavior made him unpopular. One day, one of his ministers handed him over a dossier.

    The dossier was written by one of his bitter critics in which he had made an attempt to tarnish the image of the king. The king reacted normally; took the dossier and consigned it to the flames. Surprised at the strange behavior of the king, the minister asked, “My Lord, why you throw the dossier into the fire?” “Had I kept this booklet with me, it would have busted the volcano of my anger. And this would have reduced me to ashes,” replied Caeser coolly.
   
    The theme of the story is that the root cause of anger need to be uprooted before it uproots us. Darayodan's easy-to-loose temper and his failure to tame his anger led to fratricidal war. Ravana – the king of Lanka also succumbed to his anger and abducted Sita. Had he not allowed his anger to overpower him, he would have saved his life and those of his subjects as well.

    Anger is fire. It engulfs those who fall in its trap. It blunts your mind; badly affects the power of reasoning and hampers its magical ability to sieve good from bad. A bout of anger is self destructive. It twists muscles and hits their strength. And this hastens the process of ageing. It raises blood pressure and sugar level which in turn leads a lot of ailments. Anger releases those hormones in the blood stream which prove fatal for the body.

    Anger can be tackled in several ways. Try to manage your time by planning. Avoid bad company and bad habits. Do not be a part of unhealthy and cut-throat competition. Do mediation and learn to socialize. Take exercise daily and laugh off your worries.

Speak like a Lion, never a sheep

Speak like a Lion, never a sheep.
Talk like a leader, never a victim.

- Robin Sharma

Greed is your enemy

As the saying goes, as we sow, so shall we reap. And yet we forget this principle time and again. Very often we think of our own selves first, even claiming undue favours at the cost of others. Nature is great that she keeps guiding us, and yet we ignore her warnings. It is only when it is too late that we realise our follies, but of what use then?

A learned Brahmin was giving this kind of sermon to his followers. He told them whatever we do for others’ benefit, the same would return to us manifold. Everyone praised the Guru for providing them such a profound wisdom.

One day, the same Guru disguised himself as an astrologer who would give amulets for wish fulfillment, and went to the house of one of the followers. The follower posed to be a religious- minded person, and fell flat at the feet of the astrologer to seek his blessings. The astrologer felt pleased and asked the fulfillment of whatever he wanted.

The astrologer could understand how the follower hated his brother who was his neighbour. So, the astrologer smiled and said: “You would be blessed with whatever you desire to have, but you would have to ask in just three installments one by one, and don’t forget that your neighbour would get double of what you get. So ask with due care.”

After sufficient thinking, the follower said, “Great gracious Sir, why should I envy my neighbour who is my brother? Grant us a big bungalow.” A furnished bungalow stood there. Secondly, he asked for a well in his bungalow’s compound. And finally, he asked for losing his one eye.

While the neighbours had two bungalows, they managed to enjoy living in the one having no wells. The follower’s whole family fell into the well one by one leaving their own bungalow too for the neighbours.

Moral of the story: Greed and jealousy are our worst vices. We must try our best to free ourselves from them for our own good.

Your behavior makes you a better person

Always do what you are afraid to do

You are what you do

One can’t dispute that you are what you do. You are known for your action and that is what matters in life. And manners and mores come handy as guiding factors.

One who cultivates good manners and always sticks to the accepted and adorable norms, right conduct surely follows as a natural outcome.

I attended a lecture/video show on education and holistic development recently by Dr Manishi Mishra, an expert on value-education and professional ethics.

The crux of the session was on how education can or should help one in becoming a better human being.

A better human being is one who sees, always, others in one’s own image. You maybe a great scholar with several impressive degrees but you will be known only for your human aspects, your capacity to relate with others and be one with them.

Your etiquette/behaviour should have gone drastic changes with every degree you acquired. Knowledge in itself is good but not good enough.

Whenever I think of good conduct, I think of Mark Twin, “Laws control the lesser man, right conduct controls the greater one.” This brings out the goodness aspect to be seen and followed.

To be polite costs you nothing, but its dividends come in incredibly high degrees. In fact, politeness is a way of good living; and you are doing a favour to yourself, more than to the one you are dealing with.

It is only through your good manners that many a difficult challenges come to pass as if you played a magical trick.

But, as social mores keep on changing depending on the requirements of time and other social dynamics, one has to be on constant guard and be relevant with the times.

However, within the changing dynamics, one thing should remain constant: Courteous behaviour. Amy Amy Bernstein, author of Behave Yourself, says our manners don’t change, our etiquettes change with the evolution of the self and the world around.

“Once you understand that, you can pretty much figure out the rest”, asserts Amy.

Face suffering to rise

Suffering is universal and no one can escape it. Bad things happen to good people too as life is a mixture of heavenly pleasure and hellish suffering. Shakespeare wrote, “Be thou as chaste as ice, as pure as snow, thou shall not escape calumny.” All great men suffered a great deal in life and came out greater. We need to know how to face suffering, endure it and transform the painful pebbles into stepping stones.

When we see our house has caught fire, we need to extinguish it immediately instead of wasting time over investigation into the reasons behind the fire. Suffering is said to be caused by Karma as it is intended to shape us as better human beings. But instead of going into a philosophical probe into the rootcause of suffering, we must first of all learn how to face it without being broken by it.

We all suffer in life. But we have the tendency to magnify suffering and ignore good things we have. A man unhappy for not having a pair of shoes becomes happy after seeing a man having no foot at all. We must count good things we have to offset the unhappiness.

Suffering comes with a lesson we need to learn. We must thank God for giving us an opportunity to learn through suffering. While happiness makes us dull, superficial and stagnant suffering makes us reflective, introspective and unattached to anything external.

Along with suffering comes strength and endurance. So the stones of suffering are indeed the stepping stones to go higher and higher. Mercy and the healing touch of God invariably follow suffering. It may not always be possible to see the hidden blessings behind suffering but we must look beyond the myopic vision and pray for better understanding.

Maharshi Patanjali identified five root-causes of suffering — spiritual ignorance, egoism, attachment, aversion and clinging to life. We can overcome these by spiritual practice for root-cause remedy and attain transcendental bliss beyond suffering.